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"Your gaggle is the group of guys who you might not be 'dating' or in a defined relationship with, but who fulfill some sort of need in your life," Massa explains.Remember that he's already your friend, so there's a whole lot that he likes about you, Massa says. That means no crazy makeup or boob shirts when he's used to seeing you casual. You've dated a lot of nice girls but none of them seemed like marriage material?Start seeing technology as a useful tool to get to know guys better. Before you know it, your convos will be getting offline."Instead of trying to micromanage your love life, create open spots for men, planned or unplanned, to fill," Massa says. Until you do, a guy may not even realize you're into him.When you hear a song you think a guy would like, send it to him on Spotify. Next time you're buying concert tickets for a band you love, buy two—and don't immediately decide who gets to be your plus-one. The key is getting the guy out of a familiar context. That's what happened to one guy Massa interviewed who met his now-fiancé on a volleyball team.