After dating one dud after another, you finally find someone who seems to have it all – thoughtful, witty, responsible – and good-looking to boot.Then they drop a bomb: “I used to be a drug addict.” They may as well have said, “I’m married.” But does one partner being in recovery automatically spell doom for a relationship?But before you put yourself in a position to fall for an addict, there are a few things you need to know: For anyone considering dating an active addict, it is important to realize that love cannot conquer addiction.Addiction takes priority over everything – you, children, career, financial security, even one’s own freedom.AA has done such a good job of selling alcoholism as an uncontrollable disease, maybe people believe that you can just slip off (like Lee Remick in Days of Wine and Roses) into oblivion.I commend you for not dating primarily fellow recovering alcoholics. Because then your life would be totally circumscribed by alcohol, its avoidance, the issue of alcoholism, etc. And, given that you don’t belong to any movement for recovery, it seems you don’t want to devote your life to group meetings and fellow alcoholics.
Some people are connected to people in recovery choose to attend support groups as part of their own routine of self-care.
Before diving into a relationship, find out if your prospective partner is actively using drugs or alcohol, or if they display addictive or compulsive patterns in other areas (e.g., gambling, work, sex, food or spending).
If you care about someone in active addiction, help them into treatment and hold off on turning a friendship into more until they’re grounded in their recovery.
I find it very frustrating because I am not ashamed of being sober. And furthermore, do you have any suggestions that I could use to make people feel more at ease with my sobriety? Americans in general claim that they accept that alcoholism is a disease, and accept AA.
But, it seems many don’t want it to touch their lives.